Study Task 5- Cost Of Living Calculator

Estimated needed income: 11,500

I realise that a large part of why this number is probably so low is due to currently living in student accommodation where all bills are inclusive, not having to pay council tax yet and not yet driving. I expect the number to increase substantially in my life after uni, also having to factor in the costs of being possibly self employed or maybe freelance. These costs include art materials and supplies, printing costs, packaging costs, website fees, advertisements, marketing and maybe renting a studio space to work from. Therefore to make this possible I will definitely need to get at least a part time job, as well as hopefully continuing with the selling of work on Etsy and at art markets to generate a bit more cash. 

First Art Market!

Yesterday I had a table at the Girlgang festive arts market, it was the first art market I've ever sold my work at and I only found out a week before that it was happening! After the Reclaiming Pink exhibition a few weeks ago, Kaz, one of the women who runs Girlgang Leeds said there was a cancellation and so there was one table free and I could have it if I wanted. I said yes as selling at a market has been something I've wanted to do for ages but I was so unprepared!

After a lot of panic and late nights packaging things, I was mostly ready for the day and it went SO much better than I expected. I actually sold out of most of my tote bags and now I've put the rest on Etsy. It also made me realise that the wolf prints are quite a popular seller so I'll aim to make more graphic prints! 

What I learnt from the day:

• tote bags that I thought looked rushed and rubbish actually sold well
• people love slogans, swearing and feminism, which is great because I love making art with all those things
• I really enjoy meeting and interacting with people on this kind of level, everyone was so nice! It also gave me a much better idea of the kind of audience for my work, mainly women aged 18-25
• I definitely want to do more art markets in the future, they're fun, make me feel motivated and are a great way of meeting other lovely creatives

What I'll improve on next time:

• obviously I wasn't as prepared as I could have been but next time I'd like to make my table look a bit nicer, other people had fairylights and nice baskets to display their stuff. I feel like my stall looked a little boring and didn't reflect the work that was on my table
• I need to make more of a range of things to sell, some higher and lower priced items, maybe badges?
• the pink things went down well, maybe I'll make more of that

Practitioners I'd Like To Talk To

• Lize Meddings- runs her own company, does outreach projects and sells work at fairs and markets
• Kristyna Baczynski- has a really successful Etsy shop, also sells at print fairs and teaches/lectures
• Tuesday Bassen- (never going to happen because she's mega famous and wouldn't talk to a lil worm like me) sells at fairs and markets, has done guest spots for Dr Martens etc, also has her own ethical clothing range
• Fran Meneses- really successful on social media, sells her own prints etc on Etsy and also has bigger projects on the go like her planners she designs and sells
• Ohh Deer: company that sells cards, stationery etc and work directly with illustrators and gives them a platform to publicise and find and audience for their work

Websites I've Found Useful

• nesta.org.uk
• creativeskillset.org
• AOI 

Study Task 4- Copyright

Using images as reference:

• try and seek the original maker/photographers permission first where possible
• can attempt to purchase rights to copy or use any image if needs be, where possible
• change certain elements about it, so that it is only used as inspiration not directly derived from the image 

My use of social media:

• make sure to use watermarks on any original images so that the image cannot be re posted without credit to me
• be vigilant of other creative accounts and even high street stores taking "inspiration" and not giving credit, e.g. Tuesday Bassens lollypop patch images being taken by Zara
• archive my posts so that I have a record of when I uploaded and image, so that I can prove ownership

Etsy account and listings:

• use lower resolution images on my listings so that they cannot be taken and redistributed
• watermark any close ups of artwork or clothing etc
• post images from angles that obscure the image slightly so that the whole image is never completely seen
• for clothing, use models that are distinct and unique to me and my store

Avoid using certain colours or imagery:

• Kanye Wests trademarked blue
• just look into certain colours and whether or not you are permitted to use them before creating artwork
• avoid making images that knowingly or otherwise use identifiable symbols or signs, such as fonts 

Reclaiming Pink With Girl-Gang Leeds

Yesterday I took part in an exhibition at Wharf Chambers organised by Girl Gang Leeds, called Reclaiming Pink. It focused on challenging gender roles and stereotypes surrounding the idea of feminine- and how all of us, of all genders explore femininity. The exhibition featured pink hued art made by wonderful female artists all around West Yorkshire, as a celebration of the feminine and female identity.

The work that Girl Gang do is amazing and I've looked up to them for a while, having gone to a few of their live music events before. I really admire the friendly, approachable atmosphere they create in all their events, you go away feeling supported and having made loads of new friends. They particularly aim to support creative women so they could possibly be someone to work with in the future. The sense of community and empowerment is something I'm very keen to portray in my work and I had so much fun making the pink portraits for them. I painted them using gouache and really loved working with the limited colour palette.

This exhibition was so much fun, and just an all round positive experience, I even sold some work. From this I've decided I'm going to put the prints I didn't sell on to Etsy as I now know that there is an audience for these prints. In the future I want to make more positive, empowering art like this, and also work with Girlgang again. 

Study Task 3- PEST & SWOT

Sad Ghost Club:

SWOT analysis:

Strengths:

• its an individual business model, nothing like it out there
• they make beautiful, sensitive products that really work well with the theme of the business 
• theres a kind of community art feel to it, it brings people from all over the country and even internationally, together. Using conversations about mental health as the common bond
• their social media is very well maintained, great instagram, posts nearly everyday
• their products are affordable, and theres something for everyone with products ranging from £2 to £40 in price

Weaknesses:

• its only physical base is in Bristol so not everyone that wants to take part in workshops gets the chance
• their website is a little difficult to navigate and doesn't look particularly high quality
• lots of their products are often sold out on their on line store (good because people want them and they're obviously in demand, but bad because they can sometimes be hard to get hold of)

Opportunities:

• they could maybe hold on line classes and workshops, meaning that everyone who wants to get involved, can
• they could also try to travel to different cities around the UK to give workshops and talks
• they could outsource the making of some of their products to a company such as Awsome Merch, who could make them in bulk so hopefully they wouldn't sell out so quickly
• they could also make sure that their website is maintained a little more, updated more regularly etc

Threats:

• possibly people might lose interest if there aren't any new products being made/available to purchase, their shop could do with updating more often with new designs
• their audience is also slightly limited to those who are concerned with mental health, it could be said that this audience is slightly niche
• some people seem to be hopping on the "trend" and making mental health themed products that look similar or use similar colour palettes. Eventually it might be hard for their work to stand out from the crowd

PEST analysis:

Politics: 

• discussions of mental health have been rising in recent years, with many politicians discussing it more openly and honestly. Although Sad Ghost Club don't directly focus on the political implications of this they advocate awareness of mental health issues and try and provide a support system to people who are struggling

Economics:

• many of Sad Ghost Clubs audience are young women between the ages of 15-25, who have a bit of disposable income. This could always change in the future though as the products they offer aren't really essentials, such as badges, pins and posters, and may stop being purchased if the consumer cant afford such luxuries

Social:

• The organisation speaks openly about mental health and provides a low-key network and outlet for people who are struggling. The workshops they run are designed to engage people who are down in stimulating activities and promote self care

Technology:

• The organisation is run by 2 young women who seem to be quite up to date and good at managing their online presence. They use it as an effective tool to advertise new products, raise awareness of issues, and get people involved in classes 

Personal SWOT analysis:

Strengths:

• Good at putting myself out there and getting involved (zine, exhibitions)
• strong work ethic, dedicated, stick at things
• highly motivated when it comes to personal work
• clear visual style, make relatable work
• can handle a heavy work load- feel more productive and motivated having a lot of projects on the go
• good at selling myself- strong sense of self, personable

Weaknesses:

• willingness to try new things- may affect my ability to adapt my work/ style over time
• dyslexia- bad at reading and researching, get lost in too much information and lose my original point
• put off doing things I'm not immediately passionate about
• haven't branched out and tried to apply my illustrations to different products yet

Opportunities:

• feminism movement fits well with my work, also big at the moment and likely to stay big for a while
• body positivity, mental health- things I enjoy discussing and debating in my work which are also being discussed in the wider media at the moment
• friends with other creatives, can get help setting up Etsy shop, selling, exhibiting etc
• good at relating to people, both in my work and self. Maybe makes my work more widely marketable?
• could also use these platforms to talk about things I care about in a wider sense than art- activism, charities

Threats:

• need to get more up to date with digital process- save money, more effecient, looks professional
• make more meaningful connections and contacts
• improve my range of work, not just prints
• find my niche, do I want to work for myself? can I?! Meet and speak to people that do similar things to what I want to do
• not clear on my target audience, get to know that more 

Study Task 2- The Creative Industries

Lize Meddings:
Sectors:
- Secondary: Etsy shop, selling prints, t-shirt and other products
- Quaternary: runs workshops and attends print fairs and markets

Services:
- interaction with the public in form of workshops and seminars
- buying into a brand (Sad Ghost Club) like a members only thing
- selling her own work as well as SGC merch and artwork, strong sense of self as well as brand

Success of work:
- very active on social media- works well with the personal element of her work and the age range of her customers
- informal classes and workshops help people with mental illnesses engage in arts and crafts
- very personable and real both in life and social media presence- works well with the personal nature of her work and brand



Girl Gang Leeds:
Sectors:
- Secondary: Etsy shop selling merchandise, blog, Instagram and Facebook presence
- Tertiary: hold events, meet-ups, exhibitions

Services:
- provide a supportive network for creative girls in Leeds
- skill sharing and collective projects 
- organising empowering meet-ups, parties and exhibitions

Success of work:
- strong media outreach especially on Instagram
- friendly team, easy to approach and very supoortive
- wide range of things to get involved in, something for everyone
- no personal space or headquarters, which means theres nowhere to hold their own events and establish a base



Tuesday Bassen:
Sectors:
- Secondary: prints, badges, pins, clothing
- Tertiary: online stores selling her own clothing range
- Quaternary: does live guest drawing spots at shops such as Dr Marten, social media

Services:
- personal website to view her work, buy her merch
- mailing list 
- instagram updated reguarly
- specialises in being inclusive and ethical in her clothing range

Success of work:
- strong branding- recognisable as her work
- strong sense of self and ethics- ethically sourced clothing and inclusive size range is a USP
- reasonable prices for well made goods
- good breadth of products available



Village Bookstore Leeds:
Sectors: 
- Quaternary: gallery space upstairs and social media presence 
- Secondary: books and zines sold in store

Services: 
- the selling of a wide range of local as well as international art and design, photography and fashion books and magazines
- also hold events such as launch parties, exhibitions and film screenings in the space upstairs

Success of work:
- unique and friendly space works well for the sort of customers that they get
- small function space could maybe be a bit too small for somethings but means that every event is heavily attended as people know there will be limited space/seats etc (in high demand)
- specialist shop with a wide range of one very specific thing, staff are very knowledgable 


Kate Moross:
Sectors:
- Secondary: prints and other merch available
- Tertiary: Studio Moross (focuses on music based projects), makes music videos
- Quaternary: social media accounts

Services:
- worked commercially with clients such as Cadburys 
- Makes prints
- art director for Jessie Ware
- makes music videos through Studio Moross

Success of work:
- strong branding even though its her and a team who now work on the music side of things
- strong visual style

Study Task 1- Who Am I

Self Statement:

5 things I've learned so far on the programme: 

• I learnt the importance of being true to my passions 
• to put my own personality in my own work
• how to have my own tone of voice
• the importance of making roughs and trialling lots of different ways of doing things
• to just push on and be creative when you're having a block, its the only way to make good things

5 things that I want to know more about:

• printmaking and the different print processes
• what it takes to survive as a creative person in the real world
• what areas of illustration there are
• where myself and my work might fit within that
• finding a creative process that works well for me

5 skills/strengths:

• having a strong sense of myself and what I'm about as a person
• putting a lot of humour and personality into my work
• marketing myself and my work, whether that be on instagram or in person
• being self motivated and getting things done on time
• getting involved and making connections with people 

5 things that I want to improve:

• my time management, although I do get things done on time always, they may not always have been done in the most efficient way
• focusing and staying focused on briefs that may not initially excite me, or that I feel go on for too long
• pushing myself further, to make things that are out of my comfort zone and not just stick to methods of making that I'm used to
• my computer skills, particularly in terms of using Photoshop and Illustrator
• drawing more as thinking, and maybe using it to generate ideas at the beginning of a project

5 practitioners that demonstrate my interest in illustration:

• Sad Ghost Club (Lize Meddings)- collaborative, "club" membership style of buisness, gets people involved in making, talks about mental health, products that everyone can afford
• Kristyna Baczynski- limited colour palette, strong sense of character in her work, tells stories of folklore and sci-fi
• Charlotte Ager- very expressive, fluid, sketchy images. Drawing as thinking, visual observation sketches that have a lot of feeling to them, evocative
• Rebecca Green- lots of portraits, but with a personal, sentimental feel to them. Combines gouache and watercolour with rough pencil drawings. Feels very playful and accessible
• Rob Ryan- papar cutouts, really detailed. Mostly admire how fluidly he combines word and imagery, they feel like poems. Really sentimental

5 online resources:

• https://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/kriski?ref=search_shop_redirect  -  Kristyna Baczynski's online store
• https://ohhdeer.com/   -  distributers of paper products made mainly by illustrators
• https://coloursmayvary.com/   
• http://nobrow.net/
• https://wearegirlgang.co.uk/

Summary:

I felt last year was a year of discovering the ways in which I like to make work and explore imagery. Although I’m not 100% polished and final on this I now feel like this year is a time to begin seeking a place for me and my work to fit. I’ve identified that I have a lot of opinions and causes that I feel very strongly about and one of my main aims this year is to discuss those through my work. I’d also like to get involved in more exhibitions through people and organisations such as Girlgang, and begin to sell my own work, I want this year to begin to put the wheels in motion for post grad life.

Sketches for self portrait and final image:

End Of Module Evaluation

I feel that the beginning of this module was a little odd because at the time we’d only just started the course and I was confused as to why we began looking at other peoples work immediately as I’ve only done this before to try and replicate what I’ve seen in terms of their style or methods. However through the course of the year and through the different blog tasks we were set such as the picture book research into books that fall into different categories and the blog post about ourselves as learners, I realised that the point in this module was not to try and emulate other peoples work, but to give us a better understanding of where us and our work could end up sitting within the world of illustration. Once I realised that I felt a lot more engaged with the activities we were being set and was ready to be reflective about myself and my practise for the final presentation and poster.

I have learnt that as an illustrator its not enough to just make aesthetically nice work, there needs to ideally be some kind of driving thought or ethos behind it that you want to convey through it otherwise its going to end up looking how a lot of my work looked at the beginning of the year- soul-less. The illustrators that we looked at and researched have both very distinct visual styles and clear messages and themes in their work which makes their intent very clear and their work easier for people to relate to and that is what I believe makes them successful. It was also helpful to learn about the different categories of picture books as it helped me to see that we don't all have to strive to make things that will only appeal to the very mainstream publishers, we cans till make our work how we want it for ourselves and then find the category in which it sits best.

Throughout the year this module has also helped me to examine the way in which I make pictures, mainly I’m happy using watercolour, gouache and occasionally mixing a bit of coloured pencil in to give a bit more detail. And at the start of the year especially I really tried hard not to get too stuck into using only those methods as I know I’m confutable with them already so instead I used collage, ink and particularly tried hard to use digital methods. Looking back at it now I’m really happy that I pushed myself to trial all those different methods as I think not only they've given me more confidence in knowing that I can work with those if I choose, but its also given me more faith that using watercolour and gouache is a good method for me and my practise. I think combined with my heavily emotion driven work, wet media are the perfect method because they give images a more sensitive feel, and they help me to make the image more evocative, whereas I struggle to translate all those things in digital work. I also think wet media look a lot more organic and you can really see the hand of the maker coming through in those images which is a look I really like.  However I can also see that for more commercial work like the sticker brief my illustrations and digital methods can combine really well, its more being confident and sure enough to choose the time and the place appropriate to using them.

The thing I’m the most glad of from this module has been the end few weeks where we’ve had to reflect on our practise and formalise what we've discovered in the poster and presentation. During the course of the year during this module and others I’ve discovered what a reflective person I am, I like understanding the world around me and in understanding that, trying to understand more about myself and where I fit into the world. This is important to my practise and I can see its influence in my work as I’ve made a lot of pieces that seem to be asking a lot of questions and talk about reflection and discovery, in fact that was the big thing I was aiming to convey in the final poster and I think I achieved it. I also came to the realisation that my struggle with OCD and mental health issues has massively impacted the way in which I tackle projects, at the beginning of the year I was frustrated at how linear my thought process was especially compared to those around me on the course who do really well at abstraction, and although I still find this irritating sometimes, I am now more aware that this is my compulsive brain trying to find an order in everything. It can hinder my progress and make the beginning bit of a brief where everything is a bit messy really slow and difficult, but I’ve learnt during the course of this year that the way to combat this is just to power through it and immerse myself in my work. The tics of my OCD probably wont ever go away fully but I’ve found I can quieten them by replacing their negative compulsions with thinking deeply and reflectively about my work and the tasks at hand and using that to motivate me. 

The presentation has also helped me to realise what kind of things I want to use my work to discuss, this is something I’ve been coming to terms with this year as I’ve often struggled to bring that personal side of me into my work, but now I can see how real human experience influencing work makes it all the more interesting and relatable. I now know that feminism, escapism, sentiment, mental health and emotions are some of the strongest influences on me and are also what I want to discuss and convey more in my work in the future. Similarly another one of my aims for the future is to continue making the work that I enjoy both the process of making and that I enjoy looking at and talking about when its finished, I’ve realised that when I make things for myself I am first of all more motivated to finish them which is something I’ve struggled with this year on projects that I’ve not been that mentally engaged with. I’ve also realised that this helps me to be much more enthusiastic about them and I find it easier to talk about them with other people with conviction. Finally, in the future I am going to make more effort to perfect the methods of watercolour and gouache and make them look really polished. I’m really pleased that these methods mix so well with my practise and what I want to convey with it, so I’m going to make it my mission to champion them next year by investing more time and effort into individual images and by mixing those processes with a bit of Photoshop just to give them that polished, finished look. Overall this module has helped to make me more confident and self assured of both myself and my practise and I look forward to bringing all these influences together to make more exciting work next year.

Final Presentation Slides

I'm Weird

Just wrote out the main body of what I want to say during my presentation, but I thought the way I went about it literally sums up my weird thought process when it comes to my practise. I couldn't think of any other way to brainstorm it in my sketchbook so theres a few failed plans where I tried to work out some kind of outline, but then I got out my voice recorder thing on my phone and just started talking at it trying to explain my practise and what I wanted to say. I did about 4 separate notes of all the different parts of what I wanted to say then I just typed it up into a little transcript and edited it where I felt it was needed. 

SO ODD

but it really worked, I'd definatley do it like that again in the future. The script for the presentation is quite long and rambely but I'm going to work on memorising more of it on the weekend. I kind of wanted it long and rambly as well as the aim for the presentation is to present it like I think about things in my brain, really scattered and just getting the ideas down as quick as I can and hoping to find one good nugget in there. It almost sounds a little bit like a spoken word poem thing?

I'm going to try and insert some of the voice notes here cause I'm not explaining it very well but I don't know if it'll work:

Stream Of Consiousness

Presentation notes so far:

When we were asked to think about the things are at the centre of our practice I was a bit shocked when I realised how much my struggles with OCD and mental health play a part towards what kind of illustrator I’m becoming. Thats not to say it always effects me negatively, it just really does tend to define the way I tackle things. 

So my experience with OCD means that I obsessively tidy when I’m stressed, I tidy as a way to clear my brain and in an effort to focus on work tasks, so for example whilst I was trying to think of an idea for the book cover brief I tidied the kitchen at 3am until it looked like this:

IMAGE

Or when we were meant to be brainstorming for our persons of note I decided the reason I had no ideas was because my work space was too messy so I tidied my desk until it looked like this:

IMAGE

But then the problem was that after that my desk was so tidy that I was physically scared to make a mess by getting stuck into the project. I fixate on germs and I fixate on rituals, I get it into my head that if I don't do something a certain amount of times I’m going to fail the year or get a bad mark. I make lists as a way to try and get everything thats in my brain out on the page otherwise I’m scared I might forget one nugget of a good idea and ruin my project. I think that reflects in my practise in that I like things to be linear and have a narrative otherwise my brain cant make sense of them. I’ve realised that as much as I can admire abstract work I struggle to identify with it on any higher level as it doesn't compute to me. So one way I can alleviate the tics of OCD is to just go along with it and use up my precious time making these lists and tidying to try and get the thoughts out of my head, but throughout this year as I’ve become increasingly wrapped up in this course and the idea of myself as a proper illustrator I’ve realised that another way to get rid of those feelings of panic is to completely immerse myself in my creative practise.

I realised this whilst I was getting really into the process of watercolour painting for the visual narratives book, my desk looked like this:

IMAGE

And I didn't even care. Whilst we were doing the stickers for visual communication I was so fixated on the responsibility of having to convey and important message on a tiny sticker that I found I’d rather obsess over that than obsessively tidy our kitchen, so it ended up looking like this:

IMAGE

and I barely even noticed. OCD means that I go at everything with all guns blazing so I love that this year Illustration has given me a healthy place to put all that ethusiasm and obsessiveness. It means I can put it into researching everything I can about someone for a brief or drawing out the same character 100 times until I get it perfect. 

I’ve also found that theres been so many other influences on my practise that have developed during the first year of this course, I’ve got much more into feminism and actively consuming feminist media which I like to discuss in my work, not just because I can now recognise how important it is in the greater scheme of the world but also because its helped me to be empowered and recognise my own physical and mental strengths. 

I’ve also realised how much of an influence music and fiction books have on my work, I find that these take me out of myself when I’m being too introverted and inspire the sense of escapism and fantasy I like to have in my work. 

On the other hand I really enjoy non fiction books and podcasts around topics like feminism, sexuality and science. In my work I use these methods as kind of thinking tools, I enjoy learning and trying to understand more about them but I also enjoy the fact that they help me to understand myself and where I fit into the world a bit more. I’ve realised I’m a very reflective and sentimental person, which in turn makes its way into my work and the way I practise in that most of what I do is very emotionally driven.

My first goal for next year is to improve the way in which I already use watercolour and gouache, these are methods I’ve really enjoyed working with this year as it can look different each time you use it depending on what kind of mood your in and how you use the brush. I think that goes hand in hand with the sentimentality of my work. I want to spend more time next year just working on the individual crafting of each painting. 

I also want to try and combine that with working in photoshop, I feel that a lot of the work I’ve produced this year is good but sometimes doesn't look finished. And I need to start seeing photoshop as a way to finalise things rather than “cheating”.

I also want to change my attitude towards mistakes, in that at the moment I’m still in the mindset of A level that mistakes = failure, which I’m now aware isn't true. I think my tendencies towards OCD mean that for me when I look at work of mine that was a mistake I see it as messy and just want to hide it and not show anyone. But I need to get it into my head that mistakes don't mean failure and instead mistake mean development and learning.

I also want to try and own my issues with mental health and OCD because although I’ve established they're difficult to live with they're there and might never go away. And sometimes they do have benefits like making me more organised or making all my work have a clear narrative. You can definitely see them come through in my work sometimes and whilst that can be annoying if I’m trying to loosen up and do something abstract. it means my work has a real sense of me in it, which is nice.

Finally my main goal for next year is to try and create work that is evocative. I was trying to think what makes illustrations successful to me and I’ve realised that I don't see much point in making a picture if it doesn't make the viewer feel something, whether thats good or bad. These are the images I find myself most often connecting with and those that I find it the most enjoyable to make, and since the success of my visual narratives book where I decided to just make something that made me happy even though it was a simpler idea I’ve seen that the best images are those that you put a bit of yourself into, so thats what I’m going to aim to do. 

Finishing My Poster

Today I scanned the painting that I finished yesterday into photo shop and tried to scale it up to A2 and neaten it up a bit. Yesterday I really wasn't happy with how the bottom of the image looked at all, I thought it had no depth to it compared to the complicated layers of plants at the top. Since I scanned it in I realised it really didn't look right so I went back to the idea I had in my sketchbook of adding fish into the water to make it look a bit more real, I painted them and then scanned them and edited them into the existing image on photo shop. It made me realise how far I've come with both my attitude towards photo shop and using it as a means to assisting with making a hand drawn image look polished, and also to not giving up on paintings that I've made and instead just adding elements to it to make it better. These are two things that I never would have done at the beginning of the course, I also have dropped the file off at the print room to be printed properly at A2, another thing I wouldn't have done at the beginning of the year (mainly due to a lack of organisation and poor time management) but I'm really excited to see how it turns out! I also have realised that during the course of this year I've become more fussy with how I present my work to others and the quality of it, knowing that this poster will be in the exhibition at the end of the term and will be seen by people has made me want to make it perfect.

I also think that after the first year of this course I might have worked out how I can make art thats evocative which was one of my main goals. This image for me represents the journey I've been on during this year, and its one of self discovery, challenges, successes and failures, but ultimately I wanted it to have a sense of adventure similar to the sense of whimsy and fantasy I like to show in my work. Although this poster isn't my idea of perfect and this isn't my favourite composition of anything I've done, I think it gets the feeling of a journey and a sense of triumph through it which was my main goal.

My Neck Hurts

Today I sat at my desk from 10 til 5:30 working on the same painting. I've been planning it for a few days and originally thought it could be my final poster but after today I'm not sure:

Successes:

• I'm so bloody chuffed with the top bit two thirds of this painting, I'd go as far as to say that its maybe some of the most technically good painting I've done. I really like the depth of all the different layers of leaves
• I also feel like I've worked really well with gouache in this piece, its got quite a colourful but not overcomplicated colour palette
• The composition of this I think has worked really well, considering yesterday I couldn't work out how I was going to make all the characters look like they were interacting with each other I think they make a lot more sense when positioned like this and it still gives them all their own space to exist

Failings:

• I really, really hate the bottom part of this image with the water and the lily pads, I think it throws the whole thing off balance and doesn't have nearly enough going on
• thats it, its really just this bit letting it down, I think tomorrow I'm going to take the image into photoshop and see if theres anyway I might be able to crop it down and not include the water at the bottom? and failing that I'll edit some of the fish I drew earlier this week into it to make it look more busy

Tutorial

Notes from my tutorial today:

Presentation:

• I need to find a moral or a maxim that overarches the presentation
• talk about next years goals: to master watercolour, gouache and combine with Photoshop
• what motivates me? Failure mainly, need to change my attitude towards failure
• I like wet media because its different every day depending on how I'm feeling, slightly unpredicatable, human
• Successes of first year- visual narratives, how do I replicate that?

Poster:

• SIMPLIFY
• let the characters sing, white space
• mock up different angles
• if in doubt try the original idea with the mixed character body parts
• REMEMBER= EVOCATIVE

Overall, I've come out of this tutorial today feeling slightly worried about how much work there is, but excited to complete it because it is something I'm passionate about. Being challenged to convey an emotion or the overarching feeling of something is a big responsibility and used to really scare me, and although it still does I think I'm on the right track to making something thats evocative and that I'm happy with. I just have to not panic and try things out until I get it right. And if I finish it and I'm not completely happy with it it doesn't mean I've failed it just means I can learn from it. 

In terms of both the presentation and the poster I know I want the overall feeling of them to be exploration, self discovery and ultimately success as thats how I'm finishing the year feeling. 

Poster Progress

Made these roughs of potential compositions for my poster today, I'm pretty enthusiastic about them all but I think my favourites are the first two and the last one. These mock ups have made me really think about what I want to convey in this poster, at first I was playing with the idea of self-discovery and exploration as I think those two words sum up the overall feeling this years had for me. I like the torch light as a metaphor for discovering things about my practise and being surprised, and I also like the element of this we can see in the last design with the boat. 

Somehow in the middle of the roughs I lost a bit of motivation and started making a lot of images of the characters in water, which I like as a symbol but they ended up making the central human character look a little bit lost and scared, and although that is something I've felt a lot this year I don't want it to be the feeling that defines my practise in my first year, I want the outcome to feel triumphant and brave (how I feel now). This is why I'm tempted to go with the last idea with the boat because I like the strong composition of all the characters kind of intertwined and supporting each other rather than dragging each other down like in some of the other roughs.

Tomorrow I'm going to carry on roughing the idea further whilst playing with a bit more character design and using some materials to get an idea of what I might use for the final piece. I'm feeling really enthusiastic about this project though which is helping me power through it.

Brain Splurge

Just had a really good tutorial which gave me a lot of ideas so please enjoy them (sorry they're messy):


Presentation:

• Specific Is GOOD
• Analytical is good, I do this naturally
• theme: order in chaos, narrative, productivity
• representing my practise and how I've become increasingly wrapped up in it through the course of the year, but told through my OCD and the way I interact with the space around me
• writing/blogging: I write more when I have things to figure out, quieten my brain
• REPETITION, TICKS, GETTING THINGS TO STICK IN MY HEAD
• when I'm creating and wrapped up in it it almost becomes an outlet or a place to put my OCD, obviously it doesn't sure it but it quiets it
• Life= keeping up appearances, inside and out, work, life, mental and physical health
• Rituals can help me quiet a noisy mind, help me sleep, but do they help me focus?
• talking points:
• Digital work: development, has a linear process but also unpredictable to me, chaos but in a good way
• Feminism: important in the grand scheme of the world,but also has helped me to be empowered and realise both my mental and physical strengths
• music, fiction books: takes me out of myself, it takes me out of myself, not that I don't like being with myself, I'm with myself a lot, but just like being with a good friend too much it can get stressful. Being in my brain is a stressful place to be.
• Pod casts, media: thinking tools, I enjoy thinking about things and trying to understand them more as well as use them to help understand myself more
• Visiting lecturers: Krystina and Louise- process and order to their practise, logic which made them successful as well as grafting. Nice to out a formula to it? Also nice that they apply their Illustrations to a product- makes sense to me- function

Sidenote: The presentation list I have basically come to realise will make up most of the script for during my actual presentation, those are most of the points I want to make I just have to put them in order

Poster:

• My brain is busy, shouldn't I present this in my work?
• world building, escapism
• escape means less worries
• village, or maybe staircase? obstacles things with a narrative easier to understand and unpack, linear

The main point from this: 

it takes me out of myself, not that I don't like being with myself, I'm with myself a lot, but just like being with a good friend too much it can get stressful, its good to have a little break. Being in my brain is a stressful place to be.

Magic Ladies

During the easter holidays I said I'd take part in an exhibition thats being held by someone I met on foundation, there was no brief for it I just had to submit or make one or a series of pieces to exhibit in any frame I wanted at a pub in Leeds. I said yes because partly because I wanted a little distraction from COP but also because when I saw her asking for submissions for pieces to exhibit I felt like I was ready for the first time to actually put my work in the public. This is definitely not something I've felt before and I think its down to this first year of the course and the last few briefs giving me a little bit more confidence in my own brain and my own practise (YAY)

The exhibition is to raise funds for Womens Aid which made me even happier to be submitting some work because a lot of the profits of anything thats sold goes to a really great charity (not that I'm actually thinking that anyone will buy my work, baby steps...). Because of the cause of the event I wanted to make some kind of pieces to do with empowering and inspiring women, and I'd been messing around with this witchy lady character that I've become really attached to. I started planning little sketches in my sketchbook at home as I already had an idea in my mind of what I wanted the final things to look like and the kind of feeling I wanted them to have, but I found that the combination of working from home and not having any real brief for once meant that I was really unmotivated and had to do so many pages of trials before I started making anything.

Look how many pages of roughs:

page 1

page 2

page 3

page 4

final page

What I found out from this:

• My brain can handle a task like this so much better if I give it a title and a rough idea of a brief on my own, even if it hasn't been specifically been given one by the person I'm doing it for it just helps my brain to organise it a little bit better and get to work on it quicker
• I'm really obsessed with drawing hands, legs, arms and female bodies in general at the moment, I had so much fun drawing the nude lady on the rock 
• Roughing really, really helps. It was really hard to start because I had no direction but once I started roughing, new visual ideas kept coming to me and I had almost too many elements that I wanted to add to the picture
• Simpler is better. When I started drawing this lady I drew her in copic markers with a black, fineliner outline like this:

I've realised now from some of the things we've learnt this year that things look better simplified and if you take a few of the lines out of a drawing people are still going to understand it. 

• Ladies are magic

The finished things:

I'm really happy with my time management skills because I made time to do this around finishing my COP which shows how much I actually wanted to make these things. I'm getting them printed at uni to pick up tomorrow before I give them in at the end of the month, the exhibitions on the 11th of May and even if no body buys the pictures I'm still really happy because I've entered an exhibition that wasn't mandatory, like this is the first piece of proper illustration I've just done because I wanted to and wanted people to see it. (although fingers crossed someone actually does buy them because I am v poor, hurry up student loan.)